Editorial: Well, the weather outside is frightful

Wow, has it been cold outside. Wednesday it was so cold that it set a new record low temperature for the day, -21 degrees, and Alpena was the coldest city in Michigan.

We figure by now area residents are growing tired of parkas, gloves and scarves, so here’s a little levity to the start the day.

It is so cold outside that:

* “Lake Huron looks like a large ice skating rink.”

* “Even members of Congress couldn’t get into a heated argument.”

* “You can roll the snow off your sidewalk rather than shovel it.”

* “A bubble could freeze in seconds.”

* “Superman was seen riding in a cab.”

* “Hitchhikers are holding up pictures of thumbs.”

* “Pickpockets are sticking their hands in strangers’ pockets just to keep them warm.”

* “Opticians were giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of glasses.”

Even the Associated Press couldn’t resist this week. AP reporter Ray Henry reported that “the morning weather map for the eastern half of the U.S. looked like an algebra worksheet – lots of small, negative numbers.”

Temperatures today through the weekend are expected to at least be in double digits for a change. After negative and single digits for much of the week, double digits will seem like a heat wave.

Stay warm, and keep smiling. Spring is 54 days away.